Sunday, August 26, 2007

 

Five days with my Auntie Lee


i just returned from 5 days in lincoln with my auntie lee. she was diagnosed with terminal cancer 3+ years ago and she has been actively maintaining her "quality of life" just like she stated she wished to do. it has been becoming more difficult and she has confessed that she is just exhausted after a simple outing, and more than exhausted after an afternoon of bridge with her friends.
the photo was taken with my cellphone, and i actually figured out how to get into a file on the computer so i could use it today. sarah sent a photo on thursday evening, and then lee and i texted her and sent a couple of photos. she got a big charge out of that.....couldn't believe it was possible!
she has been asking me when i would visit again and i promised to come in august. she suggested that i should stay with her. this was unusual....i stayed once when taking pat back to university, and 3+ years ago when lee and her sister vi were in the hospital. so, i knew this was a special invitation/request. so i drove to omaha on sunday and then on to lincoln on monday. we had a good time. there were no demands on either of us. we made one outing for breakfast at her fave place where she downed 2 eggs, 4 pancakes with maple syrup, 3 pieces of bacon and hashbrowns. she has a good appetite when food is easily available. cooking is an issue, altho she fixes herself an occasional egg, gets breakfast cereal, drinks lots of oj and always has a stock of ice cream. one night i fixed us some fried gizzards and mashed potatoes. we had a big laugh about that as we were in a storm warning, and she decided she could not go to the basement for shelter, so we located pillows and blankets and decided the bathroom would do. i told her she could have the throne and i would get the chair in the tub and the laugh was that if the worst happened, we could go happy after such a grand meal. :)
other than that breakfast, she stayed in.....was too tired, just didn't feel well or some other reason. she is taking lots of naps....some for several hours. i got to meet her favorite nurse jackie on thursday and she is a good one. they obviously like eachother and have a great rapport. jackie is able to say things that i would have difficulty with and lee listens.
when i left on friday, she wanted me to stay and it was hard to leave. i talked with her friend at the apt complex and she is going to check daily and call me if she thinks things are changing. i will call her if i can't reach lee by phone or if i am concerned after talking to lee. i am planning to return soon and will call more frequently so i can try to ascertain what is happening. i have asked that the nurses call me after each visit, and hopefully all these things will help us to assess her needs. last evening when we talked i mentioned the hospice facility and she said she is thinking positively about it. i suggested that the next time there is a bed it seemed like it was time for her to take it. she accepted that, but i know it is difficult. that will be a big step, but a necessary one for her to take. this is not easy for us....one step at a time. i hope i am helping her along the way, and i try to let her make the decisions, but i'm afraid that her safety is at risk, and we may need to push soon. being a grown up sucks sometimes.

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